Part Two
The Practice of Silence and Solitude
Some people practice silence and solitude as a vital element to their spiritual well-being and even to their daily lives. Others wouldn’t dispute the value of both practices but ultimately only like the idea of silence and solitude and therefore only admire them from afar. This latter group of followers never seems to get around to developing the practices for themselves probably for the same reason that many of us don’t develop habits that are actually good for us! However, here is some practical help for making silence and solitude more of a reality and habit.
Recognize the occasional "minute retreats" each day for silence and solitude.
Richard Foster writes, “The first thing we can do is to take advantage of the ‘little solitudes’ that fill our day.”[1] Trapped in a traffic jam or stopped at a traffic light, in an elevator, or in the line at the drive-thru bank can become a "minute retreat" when you consecrate it as a time of silence and solitude. Of course, the key is not just taking a breath and settling down, as important as that is. It is looking to Christ and listening to His Spirit. Take full advantage of these unexpected opportunities given you and concentrate exclusively on Him and life in the Spirit. “These tiny snatches of time are often lost to us. What a pity! They can and should be redeemed. They are times for inner quiet, for reorienting our lives like a compass needle. They are little moments that help us to be genuinely present where we are.”[2]
Set aside a time each day for outward silence and solitude in a quiet place.
This daily devotional habit is not easy to develop because we lead busy lives and because we have an enemy aware of the stakes involved. Our days are usually filled with more than enough noise, plenty of hurry, and demanding people. Unless we plan for daily times of solitary silence before God, these other things will rush in to fill our time like water into a sinking ship. Runcorn writes, “When Jesus taught the disciples to pray he was very practical. ‘When you pray, go into your room, close the door and pray to your Father, who is unseen. Then your Father, who sees what is done in secret, will reward you.’ (Matt. 6:6)”[3] Those who practice silence and solitude on a daily basis are more likely to discipline themselves to seize the occasional "minute retreats." Ultimately, establishing a quiet place to practice silence and solitude requires great intentionality—perhaps even some seemingly extreme measures. Foster writes, “Homes are built constantly. Why not insist that a little inner sanctuary be put into the plans, a small place where any family member could go to be alone and silent? What’s to stop us? The money? We build elaborate playrooms and family rooms and think it well worth the expense.”[4]
Try to get away for a few extended times annually.
"Getting away" for an extended time of silence and solitude may be as simple as finding an empty room at church where you can spend an afternoon, an evening, or a Saturday or it may involve spending a night or a weekend at a retreat center, lodge, or cabin. On some of these occasions you may take only your Bible and a notebook. On other occasions you might want to read a classical book such as Augustine’s, Confessions, or A Kempis’, Imitation of Christ. Such retreats are a good time to plan and evaluate your goals. Foster writes, “Four times a year withdraw from three to four hours for the purpose of reorienting your life goals.”[5] Although overnight getaways at distant places are wonderful, don't wait for times when you can go like Elijah to Mt. Horeb for forty days before you start practicing silence and solitude! It is important to remember that the practice of silence and solitude is intended to be a discipline for where we live our daily lives.
Personal Experience with Silence and Solitude
Many of us (including me) need to realize the addiction we have to noise. It's one thing to turn on the TV, iPod, or radio to listen to while working out or doing other chores, but it's another thing to habitually turn one of these on immediately upon entering a room just to have sound! The advent of affordable, portable sound systems (thanks Apple!), for instance, has been a mixed blessing. The negative side is that we never have to be insulated from human voices. As a result we are less frequently alone with our own thoughts and God's voice. Consequently, we have a desperate need to learn and practice the disciplines of silence and solitude. This has certainly been my experience.
Richard Foster writes, “We have become, as the early Church father Clement of Alexandria says, like old shoes—all worn out except for the tongue. We live in a wordy world with our sophisticated high-tech telecommunication systems. We now have the dubious distinction of being able to communicate more and say less than any civilization in history.”[6] Ouch! That hurts because it is so very true in my case. In order to combat that indictment, I began the formal and planned practice of silence and solitude during Lent a few years ago.
I work alone and about 10 years ago I developed the habit of constantly listening to sports-talk radio. It was completely normal for me to listen to sports-talk for 12-15 hours a day. Every radio I own, whether in the car, in my office or on the work-site was tuned to sports-talk. The object of my fast during Lent, a few years ago, was the radio. As ridiculous as that may sound to you, it was one of the hardest fasts I have ever done. The first week of silence was crushing. I couldn’t pray because there was no noise in my head. However, as the weeks passed, the silence became a tremendous source of strength, consolation, comfort and encouragement. When my father passed away, I desperately wanted noise in my head to drown out the many confusing thoughts and emotions that were trying to choke me. However, the discipline of silence and solitude forced me into a posture of quiet surrender where God could comfort me. By doing so, I was able to release the conflicting emotions and thoughts surrounding the death of my father.
During that time of fasting from sports-talk radio, I came to realize that I had been missing, entirely, a crucial dimension in my relationship with God—hearing his voice often and clearly. That’s not to say I didn’t prayed—on the contrary, I have learned the discipline of praying without ceasing. However, I had filled my life with so much noise that I couldn’t possibly hear anything God might be saying to me. The practice of silence and solitude has changed that for me. Considering some of the things God spoke to me during my time of quiet contemplation where painful and hard to accept, I could easily go back to filling my mind with noise to avoid more difficult lessons. However, I have also heard God very clearly tell me how much he loves me during those times of quiet solitude.
[1] Foster, Richard. Celebration of Discipline-The Path to Spiritual Growth, (HarperCollins Publishers, New York, NY, 1998), p. 105.
[2] Ibid., p. 106.
[3] Runcorn, David. A Center of Quiet-Hearing God When Life is Noisy, (Downers Grove, IL, InterVarsity Press, 1990), p. 6.
[4] Foster, Celebration of Discipline, p. 106.
[5] Ibid., p. 107.
[6] Richard Foster, Prayer-Finding the Heart’s True Home, (New York, NY, HarperCollins Publishers, 1992), p. 155.
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